The five* pens I would save from a house fire

And a PSA to my wife to blow out the candle before bed next time

I didn’t want to sound dramatic in the title. This was just something that popped in my mind because this question was asked on Reddit a bit ago, way before said wife decided to leave a candle on the entire night.

While I don’t particularly care about candles being lit, I can see how they could cause some adverse effects. Point in question: our four legged son decided to put his whisker in the flame (he’s fine, undercuts are still kinda in), and then, a few days later, he rested his tail on another candle. I don’t quite believe candles are that dangerous (unless you are four legged, long tailed, whiskered, and dumb), but I still think that a blog post about favorite pens (or, irreplaceable for any reason pens) is in order.

I know Toga will bring up the fact that I haven’t yet inked one of them, and I will tell them that I am sorry, but I am just that kind of person. I will save that pen. Not saying I will ink it. Save it, however, I shall!

Let’s dive in! In no particular order, I give you top five* pens I would stick in my pajama pockets while frantically rushing out of the house through a back porch and whining about not being able to grab my shoes that I wear only outside.

No. 5: Pilot Custom 91 SFM

Note: alternative would be my maroon Custom 74 with the same nib, so some nibbage would be swapped while, I guess, I’m trying to also save my tablet, SSN card, and phone? Or wallet? Do I need those?

Why this pen? Well, it’s probably one of my favorite budget gold nib pens, as I might’ve mentioned previously. It’s also one of the few gold nib pens I loved from the get go (so, one of my first ones, and one of the pens I actually do not want any work done on). It’s small, compact, classic, subdued — and yet, classy. This is the pen I would take to a coffee place in 2010s and pretend I’m a hipster who doesn’t want to draw too much attention to themselves.

Might bring the banana too.

No. 4: Zodiac Pen Co Gemini in B. And a bonus pen

I’ve spoken about this pen before, so I won’t go into too many details, but this pen remains one of the most treasured pens I own. Everything from the nib to the butt to the finish, its uniqueness, and the fact it was a gift from wife alongside the start of a bad case of needing more Zodiac pens, everything appeals to me.

Note: a pen that could step in if something happens to this one would be Black Robin Pen’s Ophelia (also a pen I’ve talked about before) with its unique shape and even more unique finish (Neon Reef Trio).

So, scratch the No. 4 and pretend I said No. 4a and 4b.

Absolutely stunning. And the pen is to die for.

No. 3: BENU Euphoria Beam Me Up B-tanto

I’m sure you’re shocked, but I have four BENU pens. However, I didn’t even go after the most elusive one I have (Goulet exclusive Caramel Latte) nor the coolest¹ one (White Christmas 1/50, also the only pen of mine that’s the Number One out of However Many). Yours truly instead went through their pen case to dig out the Beam Me Up model, because it’s the only pen that reminds me of that one time I was an aspiring young author in a bum-eff nowhere who managed to get 11 stories published before they faded into obscurity. I used to write science fiction stories, shockingly, which were — again shockingly — pretty okay, in my opinion. And, of course, I am obsessed, still, with space, and stories set in space. To this day, my favorite movie² and favorite bedtime story³ remains the Alien trilogy (we do not talk about part 4).

Naturally, when this pen appeared, I missed it because I told myself I didn’t need it. And I regretted it immediately. So I snatched it the second time around. You bet I will save it from a house fire. It has a lil space ship abducting a cow painted on it.

The level of detail takes my breath away more than… I guess space would.

I also have a pretty sick grind on the B nib. Did I get the B jus to get a cool grind on it? I sure did. Otherwise, please let me have my F nib instead. I’m the F in the nibbage world.

No. 2: Sailor Pro Gear Angel’s Delight M

Note: I bought Angel’s Delight with the 21k M nib because I couldn’t find it with a MF for a decent price, but the nib is so amazing that I didn’t stay mad at myself for a long time. No alternatives, although I do love my Kure Azur with a 21k Music nib (again not my first choice).

This pen popped up way before I even tried a Sailor (and I blame my pen pal Joe for this addiction, hi Joe), way before Sailors got on my radar, and also before I was able to actually look into more expensive pens. I am sure that this pen didn’t retail for $400+ when it was announced, and — put your pitchforks and your Bics down — I didn’t pay as much at all. Thank you, r/pen_swap.

At first glance, you might even say, “But,

@idipbananasintocoffee

, this looks like that Wancher pen, doesn’t it?” I mean, sure, if you want to be evil about it. The color, however, is something else. I’m not gonna sit here and argue that Sailor puts out a new color more often than I change hoodies⁴, but I will argue that the nib will shut up any person who says anything about cheapie plastics (or precious resin, which, frankly, is basically the same thing). Angel’s Delight is a pen from Sailor’s cocktail line, which includes, you guessed it, Kure Azur, as well as the Mojito, Old Fashioned, and several other good looking pens named after — surprise — cocktails. I love cocktails, as anyone and their grandmother do, and although I’ve never tried an Angel’s Delight, that did not stop me from drooling over this pen forever, until, finally, I bought mine second hand on Reddit.

The weight, the length, the balance, all that good stuff, all’s fine, whatever. It’s the nib that took my breath away. The juicy, bouncy, feedbacky 21k nib just… slaps, as the youths say.

I miss that old style nib. It feels like it was better than the newer ones.

No 1: Pilot Vanishing Point Raden Stripes in M (watch me swap the M for a F while running)

First of all, sorry, Toga. I haven’t yet inked it.

I just love this pen. The pictures don’t do it justice. Does it make sense that the regular version is only $150 $164 nowadays, and that this version retails for… what, $500-800? Nope. Would I ever pay that much for a pen? Well. No. Not this one.

Yet, there’s something in the fact that a utilitarian pen can look so dashing that just makes me want to keep this one close, pet it, and never let it go.

Raden versions of the Vanishing Point are Raden Stripes, Water Surface, and Galaxy; at first, I thought I’d like Galaxy best, but as my tastes changed, I opted for the Stripes just because the lines appealed to me more than the haphazardness of Galaxy and the restlessness of Water Surface. The iridescent mother of pearl bits change color as you move the pen about, and that, my friends, is how I got hypnotized into spending money simply enjoying the pen instead of actually using it. You know, despite its utilitarian nature.

I’m so inking you soon. Maybe while I’m calling the fire department. I only need one hand to dial a number.

Patient Zero: Mystery Pen You Don’t Know About

Of course I lied in the title, what did you think I would do? It was supposed to be five pens, yes, and let’s say I put them in my trusty five pen case by Galen — where is this going to go?

Running out of the door with my iPad and my notebooks and wallet falling out of my hands, I wouldn’t stop to pick them up. Instead, I would reach under the bed to grab the pen box for this one specific pen I have recently acquired.

It wouldn’t be a mystery if I showed it to y’all, now would it?

On a bit of a lighter (lol I didn’t just say that) note, I started writing this list a bit ago, way before this pen arrived. But I love the five original pens so much I didn’t want to leave any either. But if I had to cut one pen to keep this mystery one… Don’t make me answer that question.

Anyway, this pen is extremely important to me, and I would rather leave my phone in the blaze than the pen. As y’all know, we cannot live without our phones and I personally do not exist in the real world, just on the internet, so leaving my phone would mean my final demise — and still, I would rather bring this pen than my phone. I said what I said.

Now, for the reveal… you’ll have to wait until next week. I promise I will write a review about it. And you’ll hate me because I have that pen and you don’t. Muhahaha.

But come on, the house just make-believe burnt down, cut me some slack.

Special mention since I can’t replace any of the 5* that I mentioned above: Pilot Justus 95 FM (S or H, that is the question)

I have this friend who calls fountain pens odd, slightly derogatory names, and yet, when it was about to be my birthday last year, they still sent me a stupidly expensive pen that made my day. And, honestly, anyone can say it’s a gimmick, but I would call it versatile. It sounds better. Do I keep this pen on the soft setting? Of course I do. Does that mean the hard setting is useless? Nope. I do use it. I just prefer soft nibs, as you may have noticed.

The only real con for me is the length; the pen is slightly longer than what I would like it to be, but it’s not unbalanced. In fact, I think that most people should try pens that wouldn’t normally fit their exact wants, just so that they could potentially get pleasantly surprised. The pen is light, fun to use, and overlooked in most cases. At least in my opinion.

Conclusion

Now, all that being said, I am not gonna sit here and tell you that a) I am planning a house fire (I’m a millennial, I will never be able to own a house and also we live in a condo) and b) this list is set in stone. It would be fun to revisit this list in a year or five (don’t quote me on that one) just to compare it to what I will have been obsessed about in the meantime. There are so many more pen makers I haven’t been able to buy a pen from, for example. And so many more expensive pens I haven’t yet sold my less expensive pens for just to fund a new pen.

Lemme know what are your flammable pens you would bring with you in lieu of your pets, wives, important immigration documents, photos of your long departed family members, or snacks to eat while waiting on the fire brigade!

Hello! Content, of course, is free and will remain free. However, you can always show support by subscribing/pledging for whatever amount you feel like, which will help fund the endless potassium addiction.

1. :giggles at their own joke:

2. I have another favorite movie but it’s okay to have two, especially if they’re different genres. Hair. Hair is such a lovely movie.

3. I’m not joking here.

4. I’m sorry but I live in a frigid house and who the heck sweats at 75 degrees anyway.